A Gift of 7 Questions

Self Reliant Leadership is synonymous with knowing which questions to ask yourself, and having the courage to answer them and act.

1. What is your life story and purpose?
2. What sacrifices do you make on a daily basis towards the achievement of your goals?
3. When will you be making a decision to make a change in your current situation?
4. How do you evaluate yourself?
5. Do you love what you do – is it your passion and your life’s work?
6. How successful have you been so far?
7. What will be your legacy?

Extraordinary is where passion and discipline intersect.

Leadership in the making

They call it America's Game as it's the oldest rivalry in sports. The Army-Navy game was played yesterday for the 110th time. Football aside, it was quite a site to see 8,000 cadets and midshipmen all in one place. Looking at the cadets on the field while hearing the announcer say, "Future leaders of America's sons and daughters," is quite a sobering moment. It's when you realize, more than those on the field, what's truly at stake for our best and brightest. In getting to know some of these cadets, I have no doubt they take their leadership development quite seriously. Please don't miss an opportunity to thank our military men and women for their service, and consider hiring veterans for their discipline, tenacity and leadership.

Wrapping up...

This note is from a student at the conclusion of a course I teach at the University of Colorado. The quotes are from the reading, lectures and guest speakers...

Following is a list of “nuggets” – a compilation of phrases and quotes that touched me or spoke to me in some way throughout the course. Each one has been placed on an individual card, and I will keep a card posted next to my computer in my office, rotating them when I feel moved to do so. They will serve as concise reminders of what I learned in this course and of the leadership principles I wish to embrace. I plan to add to this list over time, as I continue to learn and grow in the realm of leadership.

• Face your own hypocrisy.
• My job is not to clean out my in-box.
• You can’t manage what you don’t measure.
• What would you like to accomplish to make a lasting impression for the future benefit of others long after you’re gone?
• You ultimately control two things: Where you spend your time and how you respond to your environment.
• There is only one success – living your life your way
• There is only one negative stress – not feeling in control of your life
• There is only one failure – when you quit trying to realize your dreams
• Your present life is the result of the choices you have made in the past. The same will be true of your future. – Michael LeBoeuf
• Look at yourself first.
• You don’t always know ahead of time what is actually a big decision.
• Have you earned the right in your organization to create change?
• Where are my gaps?
• I’m not any less a work in progress than I was 10 years ago.
• Are you leading by example?
• The way to demonstrate your values is where you spend your time.
• A good test to determine if a contemplated action is ethical is to ask, “Would I want to see it in the headlines tomorrow morning?”
• Admit your own mistakes openly and in good humor.
• Rules are for everyone.
• The organizational culture is the sum total of conversations in an organization. Change the conversations to change the culture.
• A breakthrough is a series of well-managed breakdowns.
• Failure is not an option.
• Three universal questions: 1) C an I trust you? 2) Do you care about me as a person? 3) Are you committed to my success?
• Listening is key.
• Leaders have to be about serving others, or they will fail.
• Performance management is not the same as leading.
• YOU work for THEM. Never forget that.
• Successful people are willing to do what unsuccessful people are not.
• Everybody knows when a leader is not listening to them.
• Secure discretionary effort.
• Empowering people means giving up some power.
• Put yourself in places where you are in over your head.
• Try to learn something big every day.
• Create a learning culture.
• What are the top three things you need to get done to be successful?
• Be a connector.
• The biggest de-motivator is having someone in your chain of command who doesn’t walk the talk.
• Provide opportunities for others to solve their own problems.
• Leaderships is an act of engagement. – Alexander Horniman
• Lift up those you serve, those you serve with, and ultimately yourself.
• How would you go about building a whole life, with a remarkable legacy at the end?
• Develop a distinguishing personal art-form of service.
• Find the compass that vectors your whole life.
• Leadership is a process, not a position.
• Your relationship is your most important natural resource.
• Behaving as and becoming a leader is a secondary by-product of an intense commitment to a purpose.
• Given your behavior toward the other person, would you be willing to trade places with them immediately?
• How do you want to feel today?
• Ready, Fire, Aim, Fire, Aim, Fire, Aim…
• You’re the one empowered to make people better than they would be if you were not there.
• If you are going to do one thing, figure out how to listen to your customers.
• Effective leaders know how to overcome people’s natural aversion to change.
• What is the worst-case scenario here?
• What do you worry about when you go to sleep at night? What do you want to worry about?
• It doesn’t matter how right you are if people aren’t doing what you want.
• Leadership is about change, not status quo.
• Change is hard because it creates more work.
• Leadership is about managing energy, first in yourself and then in those around you.
• If you worry more about what others think than what you think, you’ll likely never get anything done.
• Leadership involves sensing, seeing, and appreciating what is taking place around us.
• Power in organizations is the capacity generated by relationships.
• Leadership is the ability and the willingness to influence others so that they respond voluntarily.
• The foundation of leadership includes truth-telling, promise-keeping, fairness, and respect for the individual.
• When you move into the realm of obligation, you actually create a drain on your own energy.
• Excellence is a neurotic lifestyle.
• Set unreasonable expectations.
• As a result of that encounter, am I viewed as an adversary or an ally? If the answer is “adversary”, your influence declined; if the answer is “ally”, your influence increased.
• The ability to learn is perhaps the only source of sustainable competitive advantage.
• Every organization is perfectly designed to produce the results it’s producing.

Learn to Balance to Lead

Think of leadership as achieving a balance between task and relationship; and will and humility to gain a commitment versus mere compliance. At the center of this balance is the fulcrum of self-awareness which requires discipline and self reliance for personal growth and development. In the end, articulating where you’re going, how you’ll get there, and why it’s important is the mechanical part of leadership. The art is in working towards a balance to build trust and gain a voluntary commitment from those you seek to influence.

Learning to Lead boils down to focusing your time and managing how you respond to your environment. Your passion about the mission, and your attitude towards the people you lead needs to match your rhetoric.

Our Fallen Soldiers

I commend the president for his respectful tribute to our fallen soldiers, and believe senior members of his administration should be duty-bound to attend the arrival of every flag covered casket. Only then will we appreciate the true cost of our policy decisions.

Hiring Heroes

The woman looked and me and said, “Your mistake – you made eye contact!” Like a laser beam, she was headed straight for me on the tradeshow floor. Her name is Sara Trask, and unlike most of the corporate zombies one meets at a tradeshow, Sara was a breath of refreshing and energized air. It probably has a lot to do with her mission. She is the Director of Corporate Relations for Hire Heroes USA (http://www.hireheroesusa.org/). Somehow, I had not heard of this organization that started in June 2007. Its mission: “Through a personal approach, Hire Heroes USA serves as the bridge to fulfilling careers nationwide for our returning veterans from all branches of the military specializing in the career placement of those wounded or with any level of disability.” I am glad to know resources like this exist for our veterans, and happy to know there are people like Sara that approach her mission with the same zest our soldiers serve.

Did you do that on purpose?

I was feeling contemplative recently while riding a trail along the foothills in Denver when I spotted three young mule deer bucks grazing in an open area. I stopped to admire them, and they grew skittish and ran towards me to the scrub oak that would provide cover. As they ran full speed just yards in front of me, I watched how deliberate they were in their movement. I was close enough to hear their hooves against the dirt and rocks, but I was surprised I didn’t hear their breathing. How wonderfully adaptable this animal is that it can run full speed uphill without getting winded!

This got me thinking about a recent discussion I had with my students. We were talking about resonance, and making sure our time is spent aligned with our values. That is, living on purpose and persevering despite the obstacles and daily struggles. What is it that we do (or should do) where we can run uphill with effortless grace? The deer I watched operate on an instinct to survive. For all they knew, I was just as threatening as a mountain lion. Like the deer, we can run out of fear, or pursue a passion that’s fueled by a desire to make a difference. Is your daily running based on instinct, or on purpose to achieve something meaningful in the service of others?

Sign Post for Life

I saw this sign near Burlington, Vermont. I thought the sign was hilarious even before I saw the pond. The pond was about five square meters and twelve inches deep. I wondered what possessed someone to caution people about a pond. It wasn’t a caution about thin ice, or poisonous frogs. It was a caution about a pond! It might as well have said, “Caution – Trail.”

It got me thinking about risk. We hear a lot about how busy everyone is. We hear a lot about how managing time is the road to happiness. I wonder if the reason people can’t see to manage time is because we’re just plain afraid to say no to things. Just like we’re afraid to discard belongings. Perhaps a sign like the one depicted can serve to remind us that life without risk would be pretty dull, and what we should be afraid of is wasting our time on the wrong things.